Few things evoke so strong a reaction in us as someone taking our deepest fears about ourselves and speaking them back to us. We feel as though the curtain has been pulled back, we have been discovered, found out.
Sometimes the thing feared and spoken is true. Sometimes, it's a lie. It is almost always impossible to know the truth of the matter immediately.
I think this painful dynamic is what is actually at the center of what makes break-ups and divorces so incredibly painful. It confirms the deepest fear (in this case a certain lie) many of us are tempted to believe about ourselves: that we are unloveable.
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