What's Identity?

[Over the next couple of days I'll be posting some from my Sunday morning talk at chapter retreat wrapping up the theme of "Identity in Christ."]

For some of you this weekend you've been trying to get a handle on what exactly we mean by finding our identity in Christ. It can seem a little ethereal. But it's so crucial and what I want to do this morning is equip you to fight for your identity in Christ as we head home.

Perhaps one way to get at this whole issue of finding our identity in Christ is to understand what other things vie for our identity. And the way that I want to invite you to do this is by listening to the voices in your head.

What do the voices in your head tell you about what makes you valuable or worthwhile? What do they say about who you have to be to be successful or acceptable?

Here's a summary snapshot of what the voices in my head say to me:

-Don't screw this up.
-Don't screw this up AGAIN!
-That person thinks that you're annoying/stupid/arrogant/just doesn't like you
-I can't believe that you just said/did that.
-I can't believe you just said/did that AGAIN!
-You're an idiot
-You're not ________ enough (insert various adjectives here: smart, cool, intelligent, gifted, etc)
-You'll never be good at _____________

Now these might not exactly be what the voices in your head tell you, but my guess is that you at least recognize the tone of these voices.

So what these voices are telling me is that my identity is wrapped up entirely in my performance. I have to perform absolutely perfectly in every situation in order to live up to the demands of my internal bar. The Scriptures talk about "the law" and how it doesn't bring life. My law isn't a religious law, but it's just as destructive. I must perform perfectly at all times in order to be secure in who I am.

So what that means is that all day, every day, all of who I am is on the line. Every social encounter, every meeting with a student, every blog post must be near-perfect or else I'm a failure. And of course, sometimes I actually do meet these standards, and that leads to pride. And of course, often I fall dramatically short, and that leads to despair. But it's never done, it's never over. There's always more tests ahead.

That's life when your identity is stuck in how you perform. What's at stake here is everything about who you are as a person and where your security will come from. If it's coming from you and what you can do, which is the pretty typical sickness here at UNC, then you're stuck on the treadmill until you either burn out or die, whichever comes first.