After last night's excursion with the kids into the land of trick-or-treating, I feel compelled this morning to offer this community service with the top ten signs that you might be too old for trick-or-treating:
10. If you have to shave your five o'clock shadow before you go trick-or-treating, you might be too old for trick-or-treating.
9. If you own a fake i.d, you might be too old for trick-or-treating.
8. If you remember the Clinton administration, you might be too old for trick-or-treating.
7. If you remember the Reagan administration, you're DEFINITELY too old for trick-or-treating.
6. If while trick-or-treating you find yourself regularly distracted by worry about your A.P. exams, you might be too old for trick-or-treating.
5. If you're driving yourself to the candy-jackpot neighborhood, you might be too old for trick-or-treating.
4. If your idea of a good and/or current costume is Vanilla Ice, a Backstreet Boy, Monica Lewinsky, or no costume at all, you might be too old for trick-or-treating.
3. If half-way through roller-blading your way through the jackpot neighborhood you realize you've forgotten to take off your high school class ring, you might be too old for trick-or-treating.
2. If upon hearing about daylight savings time your first thought is, "Sweet! I can squeeze in an extra cigarette if I can steal it from my dad" you're probably too old for trick-or-treating.
1. If you're trying to figure out what to wear to prom, you're probably too old for trick-or-treating.
Further signs that you might be too old for trick-or-treating are welcome.
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