What I Write About

I write about the infinite number of intersections between every day life and the good news of the God who has come to get us.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Funeral Reflections

It would be natural to do this, but especially in light of how parallel our family's lives are, I've been thinking a lot over the weekend about how our friends have handled the pains and joys of caring for Eliza.

The thing that Kelly and I keep coming back to is how open Sam and Daniele have been throughout this whole process. They have been honest with their faith-shaking pains and struggles and they have been honest about their joys and hopes. They seem to have a clear sense that Eliza was a gift from God and like all his gifts this one was meant to be shared.

In the Christian Story about the universe, all was created good but has been marred by rebellion against the Creator. So for me it comes as no surprise but with a great deal of consternation that our culture hides and goes public with all the wrong things. We hide much of our pain, shame, guilt, and brokenness that needs to be brought out into the light. We flaunt and celebrate our rebellion and mis-spent worship that should have never been at all.

Sam and Daniele had a baby that was not expected to live for longer than a handful of days, then maybe weeks, then maybe months. Instead of circling the wagons and drawing the shades and putting up a giant "No Trespassing" sign, they invited community into their lives.

If real humility is thinking rightly about ourselves, then perhaps this was simply a sign of humility. They knew that they would need the help and support of their community to get through the challenges they were bound to face.

In doing so, hundreds of people have been encouraged by this little girl and her family. Literally. I know because my wife is the point person for the funeral today. All weekend long e-mails and phone calls have poured in. Everyone asking, "what can I do?"

Not all pain should be public. And there are plenty of things about Eliza and the challenges of caring for her that no one will ever know about--nor should they. But these dear and deep and wise and humble and hurting people have been gloriously transparent and generous with their little girl. And that has blessed and challenged many of us.

1 comment:

Burly said...

I've been thinking a lot about Eliza - her family - and my own family since you posted this. Especially since she shares my older sister's birthday (Jan. 29th). My sister, who was only supposed to live two years (with hole in her heart) and is now going on 34. Eliza was also born on the exact date (Jan. 29, 2006) as my middle son Ben. I was thanking the Lord yesterday for my son Benjamin and the time he's given me with him. My heart goes out to your friends. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away - blessed be His name. When he gives, it's easier to say. Praise the Lord that they are honest in their struggling, and that they are in a safe and loving community to do so.